Friday, February 28, 2014

B7 Re-Watch: Space Fall

Yes, this show was created by that Terry Nation. 

Where can I watch it?

The story opens where we left off. Our hero and his new companions are en route to Cygnus Alpha aboard the London.

Row row row your boat, gently down the stream. 

We are quickly introduced to the bridge crew of the ship. Long range scanners show a meteorite shower in their path but it's supposed to be clear before they get there. Riiiiigght. The Captain is shown to be a generally compassionate man stuck doing a distasteful job. Unfortunately his crew is far from being as caring. We see him instruct his second in command, Mr. Raker, to keep the suppressants as high as possible to keep the prisoners docile. He is also told to "be discreet" with their female prisoner Jenna. 

What rhymes with Raker?

Now, my definition of discreet and his definition seem to differ. Mine doesn't include sexual overtures or violence when rebuffed. But hey, maybe things are different in the future. 

Raker gets down to the business at hand, being an ass, while Blake gets down to the business of getting gone. Extra encouragement comes from Vila by way of a rumor that penal ships don't actually make the full trip. Rather, they fly halfway, dump the "cargo" out the airlock and pick up their check. 

Luckily for everyone Kerr Avon the number two hacker in the whole federation is onboard. Too bad he's a self serving narcissist who is already contemplating helping the London crew cover up murdering all the murderers and thieves in its hold. 

Help us Kerr Avon, you're our only hope. 

Blake brings him around to their side by way saying "hey, they'd probably kill you afterwards for kicks and giggles" and "you're too pretty to make it on Cygnus Alpha."

Dammit, I am too pretty. 

Of course they have to try to reach the computer center and take over the ship RIGHT NOW! Because Blake can't be bothered to take his time to plan this out. We only have months of travel ahead of us. No time to waste!

At the same time that Blake and his team are planning a takeover the bridge crew learns that the meteorite shower from earlier is actually a giant space battle taking place. Luckily it doesn't involve Federation forces so they can just detour. Unfortunately the blast waves are still reaching the ship and it's getting knocked around pretty badly. 

How could this state of the art vessel ever be destroyed?

In the midst of all this the prisoners make their move. Gan, a giant, distracts the guard while Avon uses a service shaft to get to the computer core. Because an obvious escape route should just be left wide open. When Avon takes too long, due to having to fight off a crew member, one of the conspirators goes into the shaft after him just as the ship takes another hit. He quickly gets the red shirt treatment and their escape route is now blocked. 

Meanwhile the bridge crew detects a VLO, very large object, headed their direction on a collision course. With Avon having knocked out the computer, because unlike the rest he can follow the plan, they can't dodge. Which, ordinarily would be easy, space being kinda big and all. 

Blake, being impatient and unable to stick to the plan, decides they have to break out. They over power the guard. Yes. THE guard. One. Singular. Because a hold full of career criminals really only needs minor supervision. I digress. They overpower the guard and escape. Just as Avon does his job and opens every door on the ship. 

The prisoners bumble around until they find guards to surrender to, Avon's words not mine, as Blake and Jenna meet up with Avon. In an effort to force them out of the computer core Raker begins executing prisoners. Blake surrenders because despite being crazy is sympathetic. Raker of course kills one more prisoner on principle. Because murdering an unarmed prisoner, in front of witnesses, on camera is sure to get you that promotion. Although this is the Federation. The crew regain control just as they intercept the VLO. 

This warship is particularly effective against opponents with a fear of needles. 

Determining that it must be abandoned and probably lost in the space battle they send over a boarding party. The uniforms are white but they still have the souls of red shirts. We know this isn't going to end well. And of course as soon as they board the ship communication is lost amidst the tortured screams of the damned. Not being able to leave well enough alone we send another crew member to feed whatever Old One is aboard the alien ship. 

Moar soulz pleez. 

The captain, being concerned with the better part of valor, wants to call it a day. But Raker convinces him to send Blake, Jenna and Avon over to find out what happened to the missing crew members. What they find is a sort of psychic anti intruder system that first drives you mad and then kills you. Sort of like being married to an overbearing wife I guess. 

But no psychically induced death trap can defeat Blake. He does what any good action star should do and shoots it. Thus answering the age old question. A smuggler, a hacker and a political dissident walk onto an alien flight bridge. What do they do? Deciding they should take her out for a spin, and maybe skip the stop over at Cygnus Alpha, they take off just in time for Raker to be sucked out of the airlock. Huzzah!

Final Thoughts:

I remember not really enjoying this episode the first time I watched it. The pacing felt uneven and it felt like lots of filler time. To be sure there is an element of that but this time around I enjoyed it a lot more. I feel it holds up fairly well. I'm giving it 3.5 out of 5. 

Hopefully this weekend I'll find time to review the third episode in the trifecta Cygnus Alpha. 

No comments:

Post a Comment